Signature

If you have ever received an email from me, you may have noticed that I put directly under my name “he/him/his.” Why do I do this? With the name “Lucas,” it’s safe to assume my pronouns. I am aligned with traditional masculine social norms, though I’m not sure what that means. So why then do I bother telling people my pronouns? Well, there’s a story…

I had a friend in Seminary named Tonia. She was generous and compassionate. Just a few years before I met her, she went by the name Tyler. We became friends in Seminary because on the first day of class, she shared her textbook with me. We would often coordinate our schedules so that we could study together in the library while my textbook was on backorder. Once the textbook finally arrived, we kept the same study practice. She was a deep thinker and far smarter than me. Honestly, I don’t think I would have survived several classes without her help, particularly Greek!

Fast forward four years, we graduated Seminary and I went off to my first congregation in Akron, Ohio. I served there for four years. Tonia had spent those four years interviewing with churches that claimed to be welcoming to a leader from the transgender community. She must have gone through a hundred interviews. This rejection was crushing. To be honest, I was not as close a friend as I should have been during these difficult years. I still regret that.

A few months before I came to Lamb of God, Tonia completed suicide. I, like so many, was heartbroken. I do not believe that it was only the Church’s rejection that caused her death, but boy it felt that way. I was upset at the dozens of congregations that claimed to be willing but weren’t. I was angry at the Church that put her through the gauntlet. After she died, I wasn’t sure what to do but I wanted to do something. So, I began marking my signature with “he/him/his.” 

Please understand, I by no means consider this gesture a noble act. It’s not about me. It is not about virtue signaling or any of that nonsense… it is simply about my friend Tonia. I hope that one day it becomes commonplace that we don’t think twice about being kind and inclusive toward all people. I figure, especially as a straight white man, signing my signature in this way is the least I can do. Tonia faced awful bullying, even as an adult. She endured tragic rejection. I, on the other hand, walk through life with relative ease. So, if someone notices the way I sign off on emails, then I will withstand the backlash and the mean-spirited rhetoric. I can afford to take the arrows for my friend Tonia.

For me, this story has everything to do with our Christian values. I’m not sure what Christians are doing if all the worshiping, studying, and praying does not involve how we treat one another. For me, creating a loving community is really all that Jesus desired for us.

Even if you are not transgender, I bet you can relate to the experience. Have you been bullied? Have you been mistreated? Does society claim that there’s no place for you? Then, you are exactly whom Jesus is aiming his ministry toward. Loving the outcaste is a theme throughout all of Jesus’ teaching.

Jesus says, “I was a stranger, and you welcomed me” (Mathew 25:35). Friends, who is the stranger? Earlier Jesus reminds us that, “the last shall be first” (Matthew 20:16). Friends, who is the last? These are questions that require answers. God loves all people. Yes, even you! There is no rejection in the Kingdom of God. How do I know that? Because we believe in a loving God. The Apostle Paul says it best, “we have nothing if we do not have love” (1 Corinthians 13:3).

Boldly Inclusive,

Pastor Lucas

Photo by Naim Uddin